what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
