I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize