i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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