Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
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