is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
My breasts were aching with rage.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
