Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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