I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
