I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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