It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize
