Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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