I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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