it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
