Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize