I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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