Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
