PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Randomize
