i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
If I die, sorry about rent.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize