so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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