You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
