I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
