Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize