Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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