His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
