Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Randomize
