I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
