Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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