$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
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