Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
