I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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