Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(612): View more from Minnesota

im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.

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(914): View more from New York

My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.

(845): View more from New York

She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?

(914): View more from New York

well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey

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(937): View more from Ohio

Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?

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(630): View more from Illinois

I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.

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(619): View more from California

She's still here. My penis can feel it.

(858): View more from California

Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago

(619): View more from California

FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector

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