are you still at the devil's house?
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Randomize
