i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
