She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
