i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize