I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
