Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
