all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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