Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize