we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
