Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
