bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
