It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize