New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
