How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
