So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Randomize