i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
