Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
