Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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