I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize