it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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