that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
