I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Randomize
