Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
